woensdag 20 februari 2008

Mothers I'd Like to...

Recently I came across the term MILF. I looked it up because I didn't know what it stands for, then grinned.. Mothers I'd Like to Fuck, or in other words: sexually attractive, older women. Usually aged between 35 and 50. Okay.. so I guess that makes me a MILF. Later that same day I got am IM in SL from a total stranger. It turned out he had done a search on women over 40 and my profile had popped up. He himself was a lot younger but he had this fascination with older women because as he put it: they are much better conversationalists and usually better at flirting, too.

It made me laugh. It also made me think. I can see why older women (and men) can be better conversationalists. They simply have more life experience, have seen and done more than younger people, and the chance they have learned a thing or two about themselves along the way, making them more balanced and self secured, is bigger. Then again I realize that is a broad generalization. I know childish, insecure, stupid people in their fifties, and absolutely wonderful people who know exactly who and what they are in their early twenties. The same thing goes for the sexual aspects of a person. More experience isn't always a guarantee for better. I've come across wonderful, tender and passionate virgin lovers in my lifetime, and alas also a few much older and very experienced ones who had apparently decided on the rabbit approach: hop on, do it like crazy for a minute or two, done, roll off, turn over. Absolutely boring and unsatisfactory to say the least.

I chat a bit with the stranger and then TP him to my place, where I am working on a few new designs. A minute later another friend walks in. We sit and chat for what turns out to be several hours. The young man has studied Zen, the friend is a psychologist. Soon the conversation takes flight and all kinds of subjects get discussed, from social behavior of people in large groups to personal development and what it means to make your own choices in life, from the relativity of things to BDSM in a spiritual context to politics. My mind is spinning, I absolutely love talking to people with well thought out opinions and insights and I love sharing mine.

It makes me realize that is what I miss most, sometimes. Food for thought other than from books and studying. Actual interaction with people. Apart from with my husband and a handful of online friends I don't have deep conversations a lot, simply because my life as a mother of two children, one mentally handicapped and needing almost constant care, leaves me bound to home. I crave the input and the mental sparring I was so used to when I was a career woman, traveling a lot and talking to people from all over the globe.

It is past midnight and I really have to log off, tomorrow being another day of getting up early to take the kids to school. My newly made friend tells me it is now early morning where he is.. he has spent all night talking with us. "And to think I really IMd you just to flirt.. but I'm so glad you actually have something to say!" is his comment. I guess that is what I like to be valued for. Don't get me wrong, I love flirting and cyber sex can be a great pastime. But in the end, connecting with people on the mental level is what I'm really after. And so I would like to introduce a new term.. I'd like to be a MILTT: a "Mother I'd Like to Talk To".